I lost my mom over 5 years ago. Since then, my mom-in-law has been a great stand in. She is thoughtful, caring, and pretty darn terrific, especially when it matters. Her presence makes me miss my mom a little less. One of the things I miss most about having my mom here is spending time together, doing things like shopping, going to dinner or a movie. I don't get the chance to do them with my MIL either. She has three daughters, and they often go out to a show, go up the mountain to gamble, or have dinner. I feel so jealous when they do those things - I had planned to do them with MY mom, when I was older and we could connect better. Well, I'm here now, older, but she's not.

I have a great memory of use going to see Lainie Garrett in downtown Denver, a showcase of music by Patsy Cline, who was my mom's favorite. The show was wonderful, and we both enjoyed it. But it's the only outing I remember. We never did anything just the two of us. I'm not sure why. Maybe because she didn't do it with her mom either. Maybe neither of us were interested at the time.  Maybe we always thought there would be time to do it someday when we were less busy, tired, distracted.

I hope I can do those things with my daughter when she is older, but I hope we don't wait too long. Most of my friends are lucky to have their moms, but those like me whose adulthood is without a mom know what I'm saying about waiting. I would love to have another day to spend with my mom, and chances are we would not even leave the house.