How can I put into words how I feel for my brother. The court in Larimer County has decided that his children can move with their mother to Las Vegas - and away from him. Apparently, his role as a father is meaningless in the eyes of the court. He might as well be an uncle, or family friend at this point. And the rest of us, the family on dad's side, well we are just out of luck. That also is meaningless. It seems like in the past 30 years, the court system has done nothing to improve father's rights. Sadly, my brother was told that there is no point to appeal - the decision has been made and the kids will live without really knowing their dad. Add into it that he is near 60 and might not live to see them past college - well, again, too bad.
I am heartbroken. For my brother, who loves his kids, and although he didn't change diapers, was there every single night to have dinner, to put them to bed, to be a daily presence. Yes, it took a hard blow for him to really see how much he loves them, but he opened his eyes and began his fight to keep his kids in Colorado. Now the real problems start. Kyra, who is 7, is now refusing to stay the night with Gary. Kayl, 4, follows his sister and although he has stayed the night, is torn between the two. Why are such young children put in such an awful spot? I watched as Mark crammed into two days every other weekend as much fun and excitement he could with his young daughters. Gary will have to do it much the same, but only on long weekends and holidays. And who will escort them on the airplane here? How can Gary be involved in their school, in sports, in their personal lives? He CAN'T! And that makes me damn mad!
2 comments:
Peggy,
Thanks for sharing your blog! I didn't know you had one. I have one, but well lets just say I don't have the time to update. Anyways, I'm sorry to hear about the recent events of your brother with his children. It breaks my heart when kids are caught up in the middle of custody. Most people say "oh,kids are resilient and they'll learn to adapt." The only true part of that is yes, they'll adapt but their hearts are scared for life. A simple band-aid could never cure the hurt they will go through.
I too am dealing with custody issue within my family. Only in reverse order of yours. My aunt had her kids ripped from her about a month b/c my ex uncle filed a false police report that she was hitting and abusing her kids. Her children are 12,10 and 8. Her oldest has refused to see her father since the divorce in April of last year. To keep the waters calm my aunt and uncle agreed she's didn't have to go. Now in the state of Colorado, children are forced to live with the parent they do not get along with for a minimum of 4 weeks. Now that might not seem like a very long time, but the judge granted my ex uncle 3 months of full time custody and supervised visits for my aunt. Its a huge mess.
I can only hope that your brother doesn't give up on the fight for his kiddos. They need him just as much as he needs them. Keep us updated.
Peggy I am so sorry about your brother. I know his heart must be broken. But giving up hope is the last thing to do. His kids are so cute(I saw pics)and they will never forget their dad. One day they will want to know him better than they will growing up. He just needs to never give up. Even if he only gets to see them on weekends or holidays. It will mean so much to them.
Can't wait to see you guys on Sunday.
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