A glossy 8x10 photo rolled up and held with a rubber band that was just about to break. Sliding the band off one end, I unroll the photo, unsure of what it is of. Ah, the 10 year high school reunion photo. Naturally, I scan for my face. I’m not in the photo. But I remember being at the reunion – why wouldn’t I be in the photo? Then I look closer, and see my friends – Diane, Wendy, Kendra. I was sitting right there next to Wendy (I still recall this after so many…. 15….. years later. Oh, yeah, I was one of the three people that the photographer missed, off to the left. Not even a hint of my dress, or my shoe, or a hand – nothing! Like I wasn’t even there! But off to the right of the photo is a great shot of a table, a few chairs – oops, I guess the photographer was drinking along with the alumni. Maybe he was an alumni.
That pretty much sums up my high school existence. I was there, but went mostly unnoticed, especially by the boys. Of course, I didn’t get involved in many activities, didn’t hang out with the in crowd, and wasn’t a cheerleader – thing that would get me noticed. But I still existed, and in a small circle of friends I made my way, just like everyone else, through the halls of senior high. The funny thing is that on my profile at classmates .com, I have had over 100 visitors. Who? Who knew that I existed – what I looked like – wants to know about me now? Until I stop being a cheapskate and pay for a gold membership, I will never know. (Secretly I think it's a ploy by the website to generate your curiosity) But then again, can you really revisit the past and pick up old friendships? We are all made up of the life experiences - since the day we started school right up until today. What path our lives have taken are so very different, and the one thing – the only thing – we all have in common is graduating from the same school. After that we have each embarked on our own adventures. Sure, some have been friends all along, and some even married a high school love. But really, most of us set out, alone, with the school life fading as real life began.
Mark said it best: we start out in kindergarten, just us as a piece of confetti in a small bubble. As each school year passes, we gather more confetti, each one representing the people in our class. As the day of graduation comes, the bubble bursts, and each of us, like confetti, scatter. Some sticking together until something moves us away, most of us off in a new direction. The confetti is never in the bubble again.
Looking back, the only regrets I have are that I didn’t get better grades and go to college, and get into journalism, and that I let good friendships slip away. I’m sure I can find some on facebook and myspace, but then what? Friendships require work. If I haven’t done the work up until now, what would be different if I reconnected with those past friends? Maybe that’s the best part about classmates .com. You don’t have to do anything more than say hello. After that, you can move back into your now life, leaving the past life where it should be. In the past.
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