The White Van

The letter came home Friday afternoon. Direct from the school principal, it described an incident that happened early that morning - a boy, 10, escaped an abduction only a few blocks from the school, and in the presence of his sister. It happened just before school, and at a time when the area is usually busy with parents dropping off kids. The boy, thankfully, did what he had been told to, and was able to get away. I can only imagine the fear he felt as he and his sister ran to the school and how he told the first adult he saw. I can't imagine the feeling his mother felt when she got the call, telling her what almost happened.

I had heard of the attempted abduction on the news earlier that day, only the report mentioned a different school, one that is closer to our house. Several news stations made the same report, and I felt a small sense of relief. However the letter form the school changed that. I now felt scared, angry, frustrated. I can't understand why this sort of thing continues to happen. I don't want our kids to live with the fear of it happening to them. I am angry that there are bad men - perverts - lurking everywhere. The description of the guy was typical: middle aged, mustache, balding, and of course driving a white van. It's always a white van! But I know this really isn't typical - the bad guy can look like anyone, even a relative, and drive anything, including expensive cars.

I struggled with how to talk about this with my daughter. She's only 5, but understands plenty about stranger danger, but not only strangers - we are suspicious of all people these days. I find myself thinking about every male she comes in contact with - can they be trusted? I can't find a way to in a sense ruin her feeling of safety and tell her such bad things happen right here in her neighborhood. Of course, these things happen right in some children's families. Our family has an uncle, thankfully now in a care center under supervision, that tried plenty to fondle both my sister and, ten years later, me.

I feel that we need to return to the "village" mindset. It does take a village to not only raise our children, but also to keep them from harm. I will be one parent with a watchful eye toward the children in our village. I will not be afraid to speak up if I see something that doesn't look right. I will talk with my daughter, and other children, about their lives and if something is bothering them - not to replace their own parents, but to give them another adult to trust. We all have to do this, be this support for our children. We need to be each child's parent when their own is not around, for their safety if nothing else.